Chapter 5 ~Lost Love~

Ken walked over to Tetsu... He was also drunk, but out of the four, he was the most sober. He sat down beside him and patted his head.

“I’m sorry, Tet-chan...” He said in a soft voice.

“Screw him.” Tetsu answered.

“Uh... Sakura will screw him...” Ken replied and soon realized his words would hurt his friend, so he shut up.

“I’m sorry, again, Tet-chan... I told you to act fast!”

“Shut up, Ken! Don’t be silly! Haido would have never fallen for me. I’m not Sakura!”

“Sorry, but I’ve drunk too much, I don’t understand.” Ken said and waved at the waitress for two more glasses of whisky.

“Look at Sakura! He’s tall; long, dark-haired, and extremely good looking!” Tetsu moaned.

“Huh? You like Sakura too?”

“No! I mean... Look at me... I’m not good looking. How could I ever think Haido would like someone like me!?”

“Tet-chan... Uh... ya ever look at yourself in a mirror? You are damn good looking, man! Look at all the girls that have been flickering around you!!”

“It’s just because I am in the band!”

“Baka... you are good looking. Damned good looking. And damned stupid too! You should have been bolder and Haido would be squealing in your bed instead of Sakura’s! All you need is guts, not looks!”

“I don’t need anything any more... Maybe just another drink...” Tetsu sunk his head between his arms on the table again, and began crying softly like before.

 

Sakura entered the hotel room carrying Hyde in his arms.

“Ne... Sakura... chaaannn...” Hyde started yelling again, totally drunk. “I feel sick...”

“No wonder...” Sakura was drunk himself.

“I’ll puke.”

“I’ll drop you if you puke on me!”

“Take me to the bathroom!” Hyde pleaded.

Sakura put him on the bathroom floor carefully. He removed Hyde’s flashy sheer shirt and held his hair backwards, as Hyde began to throw up in the sanitary. His eyes were full of tears from the strain that his upset stomach was causing him. The convulsive movements of his thin, frail body shook him violently every time, and Hyde started crying out of his drunkenness.

“I feel like crap!”

“You look like crap!”

“No! I always look pretty!”

Sakura kept Hyde’s hair backwards in a ponytail, and caressed his shoulders with his idle hand.

“You don’t usually drink, na Haido?”

Hyde kept throwing up.

“What a silly bishounen...”

“Cut that crap!”

“You’re done?” Sakura asked after a few minutes.

“I think so...” Hyde nodded.

“Then go rinse your mouth. Brush your teeth. Uh... take a bath too...” Sakura said as he flushed the toilet.

“We’ll have sex?”

“Not with you smelling like puke!”

“OK, I’ll take a shower and I’ll brush my teeth...” Hyde said.

“Ya feeling better, Haido?”

“Yeah... sorta.”

“OK. Make haste.” Sakura grinned and left him in the bathroom.

 

Next day, at the rehearsing studio...

“Tet-chan! Ken-chan! Ohayo! We did bring the house down yesterday!” Hyde greeted nervously, followed by Sakura.

“At least you bring him here early.” Tetsu pointed out between teeth.

“How’s your butt, buddy?” Ken asked bluntly, and both Hyde and Sakura blushed. Tetsu put his bass guitar away and walked towards the terrace. He needed fresh air before he did something he might regret.

“Tet-chan?” Hyde called.

“What?” Tetsu growled.

“Are you mad?” Hyde asked walking behind Tetsu.

“What do you think?” Tetsu said as he tried to hurry away.

“Tet-chan!! Please!!” Hyde ran after Tetsu.

“Leave me alone, will ya? You did give the big gay show yesterday!” Tetsu howled at him.

Hyde started crying and walked fast behind Tetsu. “Please, Tet-chan... I knew this would happen. I’m sorry. I know I lied to you, but I did it because I thought you’d be mad at me! You are very important to me!”

“Shut up! Moron!” Tetsu was indeed mad at Hyde, not just because of the previous day’s scene at the party, but more because he felt his love shattered.

Hyde tugged from Tetsu’s shirt.

“Release me or I’ll hit you!” Tetsu groaned.

Hyde pushed Tetsu forcefully inside a room and locked the door behind him.

“Are you insane?” Tetsu was fuming. “I told you I’ll hit you!”

“Sakura told me last night that you are in love with me.” Hyde tried to stay calm. “Is that true, Tet-chan? If it is, then lots of things begin to make sense...”

“It’s not true! He’s just acting jealous around you!”

“If you are, then, I’m sorry I never noticed... You should’ve told me...”

“Shut up! Baka! You think everyone is just as fucked up as you are?”

“Tell me what you want, and I’ll do it...”

“I don’t want anything!”

“Tell me, don’t be embarrassed.”

“OK. I want you two to stop acting like idiots!!”

“Good.” Hyde nodded.

“Now let me go!”

“No. Now tell me what you were wishing I would do all this time.”

“What?”

“Yeah. You wanted me, right? You wanted me... but never told me. It’s OK. I would have been shocked before, but not now. It’s OK, I tell you.” Hyde tried to reassure him.

“Please, get out of the way and let me go.”

“Say it bluntly, Tet-chan. You want sex with me? It’s OK. I will do it. Because you are very important to me. I will do anything you ask me.”

Tetsu was about to break down and fall on his knees crying. “I just can’t believe my ears, Haido...”

“I will. You want me now? I will do it now, then.” Hyde began pulling off his sweater.

“Stop this!! Are you crazy?” Tetsu pulled Hyde’s sweater back into place.

Hyde began to cry and braced himself sitting on the floor against the door.

“Tet-chan. I will do it. If you want me to, I will. I wouldn’t agree to this with anyone else but you.”

“Or Sakura...?”

“Of course. He is my boyfriend.”

“So, basically, you’d have sex with Sakura or me...”

“Yes.” Hyde said looking down. “... If that makes you be cool with me, then yes.”

“What if Ken-kun gets jealous?”

“OK, then Ken-kun too. If it is necessary to be OK with you two, then...”

“You are such a slut, Haido... Let me go. I’m tired of you! I don’t want to see you or talk to you!”

“I’m giving myself to you, Tet-chan! Just because I want you to like me again!! Please!!”

“Let me out!!”

Hyde began crying profusely and desperately. “You think it’s funny for me to do this? You think I don’t have any feelings or self-respect? I don’t want to hurt you or Ken-kun, so I will do basically anything you say... Please... please... like me again... please! I didn’t plan on falling in love!! It just happened!! I didn’t do it on purpose to ruin you!!” Hyde sobbed and cried loudly. “You are more than the bassist for me... you are like a brother to me.”

Tetsu looked at him with pity. “Just... let me go, Haido...”

“I promise you, I will do anything... just let me be with him... I love him.”

Tetsu felt a grip tightening around his heart. “I won’t come between you two. And you don’t need to sacrifice yourself for me or Ken-kun.” Tetsu walked towards Hyde and caressed his head. He had given up.

“Please? Can I have this one little thing? It’s so important to me... I really want to be with Sakura, he’s the one I love... I know it sounds weird, but...”

“Yes, you can.” Tetsu gave in. He had to come to accept defeat.

“I’ll be a good boy and I won’t show off our love... I’ll do everything for the band, everything I can... and I’ll still wash your clothes, Tet-chan... and cook, and I will do everything at home, everything you say... please...”

“Don’t cry, Haido. I won’t push you away from him. As long as you two work hard for the band and never do anything that might harm it.”

“I promise, Tet-chan.”

Tetsu kneeled down and softly pecked on Hyde’s forehead. “I believe you. And you needn’t cook or wash my clothes.” He said in a soothing voice as he stood back up.

Hyde stood up and unlocked the door. He opened it slowly trying not to sob.

“Ne... Tet-chan...”

“Hai?”

“I still think you’d make a sweet lover... I wouldn’t have minded...”

Tetsu rolled his eyes and tried to hide the pain in his heart.

“You’d have taken good care of me...” Hyde added in a low voice, almost a whisper.

“Doesn’t he take good care of you?”

“Yes, he does. He loves me.”

“Then, don’t cheat on him with those words.”

“No. No. I won’t. He’s all I can think about.”

“Good.” Tetsu nodded and walked away. The lump on his throat was about to choke him.

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